Friday, January 4, 2008

Blast From the Past.

You forget how far we've come until you look at some old text media pages from a decade ago. Oh, those simple simple people.

You Know You Are Too Serious About Computers If...

* If no one can reach you by phone since your computer is always online.
-- Nope.

* If you can type your top 10 favorite web sites....by heart.
-- Who can't?

* If you can locate a particular home page without using a search engine.
-- Does that include the hundred bookmarks?

* If you can write your own html page.
-- DUH!

* If you download more than 20Mb from a binary newsgroup...in one session.
-- WOW. You need to spend 2 minutes on those bin sites to qualify for geekdom. What Like I'm going to download 25 seconds spread out over multiple sessions?

* When you find it easier to dial-up the National Weather Service: Weather/your_town/now.html than to simply look out the window.
-- That's certainly not easier. Though clicking the one link on my firefox bar linking to Google which gets an RSS feed of the local weather is actually easier.

* When you order most of what you buy.....online.
-- Um, was this ever a sign of geekdom? Because ouch. I'm writing this on a computer I bought from newegg, next to a nice pile of books I got from Amazon. I'm drinking from a Pokerstars cup I ordered up with some player points online.


* When you log-off from a session in your favorite newsgroup, and your log reads: Online time: 56 hours 24 minutes.
-- Log Off? My current uptime is 5 days and that's pathetic. I've done months on end before.

* If your net provider suggests you try a competitor, because you're exceeding 300 hours a month, connect time.
-- I have a connect time of (24 * 31) = 744 a month.

* When that 112 GB hard drive is full.
-- I had a 120 gig drive that I gave to my roommate. I just handed it to him. Not because it sucked, but because I only have the two systems and the other one has 720 gigs and this one has 1.7 tb and I didn't have the drive slots for tiny drives.

* If 300 Mhz is simply too slow.
-- You're kidding right? The other day my mother picked up an old 700 Mhz system, I chuckled and recommended she throw it out.

* When your desk collapses under the weight of your computer peripherals.
-- Is that a weak desk or does this electronic stuff weigh more than one or two pounds?

* If you can actually talk to the computers in your new car, and understand what they say.
-- There's actually a device for that. It's USB compatible and helps diagnose your car.

* When you modify the programming of your car's computers and actually get better mileage.
-- That's actually a real thing too.

* When you can access the Net, via your portable and cellular phone.
-- Who would, the rates are crazy high. Though, It is only a button.

* When you put a CD-ROM in your car's player.
-- What? Like a burnt CD full of mp3s? Or am I being asked to dig up an old CD-ROM and put it somewhere. Or is a CD simply considered a ROM?

* If every sentence you utter begins with, "On the Net..."
-- Nope. That's assumed. No need to start sentences like that.

* If you put your e-mail address in the upper left-hand corner of envelopes.
-- Hm. That's actually a good idea.

* If you have your e-mail address printed on your stationery.
-- That's actually nearly universal.

* When you insist on seeing the movie "The Net" for the 63rd time.
-- That's actually nearly unheard of. Most people can't stomach once.

* If you maintain more than 6 e-mail addresses.
-- Yahoo, Yahoo, Google, Hotmail, Website bouncer. - Nope.

* If you use more than 20 passwords.
-- Duh.

* If you set up your own Web page.
-- Duh. Though I let it expire. I do have a couple cheap replacements:
http://tatarize.nfshost.com/
http://www.geocities.com/tatarize/index.html
These do different things and are both used in different ways. I highly recommend Nearly Free Speech even if you do few things which might require hosting. A purely solid site, pay for what you use. Used them for various things spent 12 cents. Does this blog count?

* If you set up a Web page for each of your kids...and your pets.
-- True by default. I have no children or pets.

* If, instead of a phone number, you ask someone for their e-mail address.
-- And?

* If you don't know anyone who DOESN'T have an e-mail address.
-- What do you mean doesn't?

* If you convince your mom that she HAS to get online because e-mail is so much cheaper than long distance phone charges.
-- We have Vonage. Our long distance calls run through the cable, as such they are free and unlimited. I could call someplace and just leave the phone off the hook. Don't know why though.

* If you can write a list like this.
-- Hardly, I don't even remember how sucky it was back when my torrent client didn't have its own RSS feed, I certainly couldn't remember how bad it sucked a decade ago.

* If you can relate to a list like this.
-- I certainly cannot.

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