SNL politics.

I thought the parodies of the 2000 election debates were classic by SNL. The latest intro is also quite good.



Tina Fay absolutely nails the Palin impersonation.

Minutia of the Day: Black-eyed Susan girl.

The most famous political ad of all time is the Daisy Girl ad put out by Johnson in 1964. The ad was actually titled "Peace, Little Girl" as the name Daisy Girl probably wouldn't have occurred to the makers of the ad because the flower in question is actually a Black-eyed Susan. At least according to Birgitte Olsen the woman (then girl) in the ad.

OLSEN: I don't remember that. To me it was a big field with daisies, you know? Actually, I remember it not being daisies, but Lazy Susans (Editor's Note: We assume that Ms. Olsen meant to say "Black Eyed Susans"), you know—the yellow with the...

CONELRAD: But everyone called it the Daisy ad.

OLSEN: Yea. I always wondered about that later because I remembered distinctly what kind of flower it was (laughs).

You can actually also count the pedals if you ignore the girl counting, I counted 11.







Also, her sister (Annette) was Susan Spotless. Every litter bit hurts.

So now in political discussions about the ad, you can have something so obscure to mention that you clearly have analyzed every little bit of minutia about the ad... you must be brilliant. Now all you need are friends who bring up 60s political ads.

Why you should vote Republican.

When you spend years being tortured you want a pretty wife.

I know the campaign is getting into full swing but that's an impressively depressing story. Before McCain was released from his POW camp his wife got in a car accident and was hurt, crippled, and put on some weight... so when McCain came back he started stepping out on her and married his new wife 18 years his junior and with considerable wealth about a month after divorcing the woman he came home to.

That's kinda cold.

California: Home district voting totals.

The people (how very distant they seem) in my family actually live an Even district. So it would take a lot to force a 3-1 split. And, frankly, it happened. 3-1 in favor of Clinton. Arg. Clinton took my district at a 2.025 to 1 margin. That .025 there means a difference of two delegates (One from Obama, One for Clinton).

Update: Wait, those were older numbers. Late breaking votes for Obama according to raw vote totals: 1.84 to 1. Means a two/two split. The 33.7% of the Obama supporters in this area succeeded. With 100% of votes in. What a difference between 63.2/31.2 and 62.1/33.7!

Woo... go 43rd congressional district.

THE FIGHTING 43rd!

Update: Never Mind. The math is more arcane than that. 62.1/(62.1+33.7)>.62! Hillary actually does snag 3-1 rather than 2-2.

Boo... go fuck yourself 43rd congressional district.

THE FRIGGING 43rd!

Spirituality and the 95% withdrawal.

There seems to be a certain idea that for everything there is a Golden Mean. If there's two sides which are categorically opposed, the truth lies somewhere in the center. In reality one side can, in fact, be completely wrong. With fundamentalists and atheists we have the moderate theists who agree with atheists in spirit when they address the problems of fundamentalism but refuse rather to accept atheism is the answer rather the truth lies in the middle, not no God or too much God but the Just Enough God of spiritualism.

How can you be a rational individual while not being a crazy fundamentalists and don't want to be called an atheist? You can just take some extremely wishy-washy middle ground either it's claiming to be agnostic (not in the proper sense but in the weak atheist sense) because you don't disbelieve in God as you claim atheists do (you just don't have any evidence that he doesn't exist either), or the higher power claim laced with large amounts of special pleading. There simply MUST be something more! THERE MUST! THIS CAN'T BE EVERYTHING! Note that when they say "this", they are referring to everything. And then there's spirituality, where they believe in something vague and spiritual. Who could argue with that? Or the liberal Christianity side where you pay occasional lip service to Jesus without having read any part of the Bible or going to church.

The idea that the truth lies somewhere in the middle and that going all the way to one side opens you up to criticism. Which is pretty well the reason why the Democratic primary front runners all support this plan for a 95% withdrawal. Oh, we'll remove everybody from the Iraq except one brigade who we will have in this one bunker. You're surrendering! You're going to lose this war! "No see because I have a bunch of guys in a bunker somewhere during this civil war, that's why I don't really lose. I'm spiritual. None of this, it was a bad idea from the start and I'll completely wash my hands of it, I'll just wash my hands of as much as I can without being called a coward. I have just enough God... and just enough stupidity."

We really need to make the middle less solid ground, politically, religiously, and practically. Collaborators shouldn't be tolerated.

Goebbels would be proud!

WASHINGTON - President Bush, cheered on by Iraq war veterans and their families on the White House's South Lawn, urged lawmakers Tuesday to back his plan to withdraw some troops from Iraq...

President Bush asks congress to back his plan to withdraw troops. Hey jackass it doesn't count as withdrawing troops if those are just the 5700 kids you aren't allowed to keep there forever and have to rotate them a bit. My goodness, this latest push is pure propaganda and it seems to be tossed around like candy. That entire line there seems to give the distinct impression that:

Bush wants to withdraw troops.
Congress is opposed.

What kind of sick joke is this? Bush isn't at all drawing down any troops at all. He might as well count those kids coming back in wooden coffins as troops he's withdrawn... they are the ones he can't force to stay there and this smug bastard wants to claim the high ground? Man, that is pathetic!

I'm impressed. This is a level of game the Bush administration hasn't been playing since the run up to the war. They are fighting tooth and nail to try and make the idea of a forever-war at least not political suicide.

God Snot: Official Endorsement.

God Snot is Officially Endorsing: Alan Keyes for the Republican Nomination for President. (Via Pharngula, Via Amygdala).

My position up until now has been to: Don't sink the leaky boats until they're in the race. Well, with this new possibility, I think there is a boat *SO* leaky that it needs to be in the race. It is for these reasons that God Snot (Where God's Not) is officially supporting Alan Keyes for the Republican Nomination.

God Snot is also supporting John Edwards for President.

Bush is an idiot and I hate PR.

Apparently some small withdrawals makes indefinite and untenable war tenable or so Bush would have us believe.

"The way forward I have described tonight makes it possible, for the first time in years, for people who have been on opposite sides of this difficult debate to come together," Bush said

Oh, yeah, what a way to come together. Slightly fewer troops, that's really going to make the fact that we spend billions every month and have lost thousands of lives totally worth it. Now, I can support this unsupportable war... than you Mr. President.

I now see, that when I said we had no business in this civil war, were stupid for going in, act as a lightning rod for violence, and are accomplishing less than nothing by leading to more terrorism and thus should get out right now... what I really meant was 130k people stuck in a worthless war is totally my magic number. Because, I only worry about the number of enlisted men and women and not about our presence in general and the billions of dollars it cost to keep a really crappy foothold in a war zone.

"The more successful we are, the more American troops can return home," Bush said in remarks prepared for a prime-time Oval Office address to the nation.

That's what qualifies as supporting the troops? Keeping them hostage. "Now look, I'm not the ones keeping them there, they just aren't doing very well in a zone of escalating violence and civil war. Don't blame me... blame my war!"

Fuck Bush. -- Seriously, I'm actually really mellow and nuanced, and that's my mellow and nuanced position on the issue: FUCK BUSH!

I can tolerate war, needless genocide, murder and all the little things that makes life end so cheaply... but to be insulted, belittled, and talked down to by the worst president in history and the end all and be all of governmental failure, I won't stand for it.

When Clinton Was President...

When Clinton was President we had one category 5 hurricane: Mitch.

While Bush has been president, we've had eight! : Isabel, Ivan, Emily, Katrina, Rita, Wilma, Dean, Felix

I know, what you're going to say... Oh that's just global warming and the hot water feed the hurricanes power. No. It's an amazing correlation!

Well, under Bush 41's one single 4 year term. There were two: Hugo, Andrew. Though, if you count the time they were president Elect, Bush 41 gets Gilbert added to his tally. Andrew would then not be added to Clinton because it was a month before he won the election. So since this figuring helps my cause let's count president elects.

Bush 41 had 4 years with 3 category 5 hurricanes.
Clinton had 8 years with 1 category 5 hurricane.
Bush 43 has 7 years with 8 category 5 hurricanes.

Bush 41 (R) has a .75 cat5/year index.
Clinton (D) has a .125 cat5/year index.
Bush 41 (R) has a 1.14 cat5/year index.

This also should note that in the last couple weeks Bush 43 has been averaging 1 cat 5 hurricanes a week!

Repubican Senator caught soliciting gay sex... but what's this I hear.

At first when I heard the Craig was convicted of soliciting an undercover officer for lewd acts in a public bathroom I thought par for the course.

The odd part of the story is this:

“At 1216 hours, Craig tapped his right foot. I recognized this as a signal used by persons wishing to engage in lewd conduct..."

Does the gay community actually have lewd act bathroom stall tapping signals? Is there some secret gay code or something? It's not fascinating as some kind of social observations, I just love secret codes and I'm pissed that I don't know what they are.

Fine, keep your secret tap codes and your ability to put on matching clothing. I'll go learn the Mason's secret handshakes (which coincidentally were exactly borrowed by the Mormons at the Temple until a few years back when they got rid of them for exactly that reason).

Dislike for congress.

I also think it's classic that many news networks are tossing around the idea that the low opinion of congress somehow vindicates Bush. See, they hate everybody in the government! The truth is they hate Bush because he's the worst president ever and they hate congress because they don't step up, impeach Bush and Cheney, have President Byrd (president pro tempore of the senate, although with the senate that close perhaps Pelosi should do it, though she was the one who wanted impeachment off the table) withdraw the troops, have the senate go nuclear remove the filibuster and ram through a reversal of the last six years perhaps before the next hurricane destroys a city and nobody is around to pick up the pieces.

In short, they hate Bush so much that anybody who isn't fighting with every shred of their being is a traitor.

History views him kindly...

Has anybody considered the irony that historians will have to fight when they write about the worst president in history whose only plea is that perhaps history will view him kindly. That his only Hail Mary is that perhaps historians will be completely stupid and not realize that staying in a worthless intractable war with bizarre delusions about future historians liking him was something noteworthy and respectable?

Secondly, what about the Rapture? Certainly since the crazy nutjob rapture-loving loony Christians are the only ones who are still brainwashed enough to believe Bush (yes I'm talking about Bush 43 if "worst president in history" was clear enough) is anything more than a complete disaster. And if they are yanked into the sky, who will still be around to write a favorable review of Bush in any history book?

Also, it might help if the same powerful lobby that manages to get any evolution tidbit downplayed in text books would also require that history books cater to these delusions.

Incarcerex

... And that's when Edwards lost my support.

It isn't his religion, it's his lack of faith that really has pushed me away from support. He says that it would be wrong to to use faith beliefs to make any policy decision. That is obviously correct. But, doesn't that make him a liar or at the least dishonest? It would be like me saying, "I fully understand and completely believe in chemistry, but I would never use my chemistry beliefs to inform my political decision." -- So when some bill comes up asking to ban all chlorine from everything, I won't rely on my background in chemistry to say, 'hell no'. 'We need chlorine for water, PVC pipe, and salt'. I will not do such a thing. I will make my decision on fear mongering alone!"

No certainly there's a difference here. Chemistry is real, objective, and science and faith is nonsense. However, he shouldn't know that. In order to be honest, he should rely on his unsound beliefs to make unsound decisions, or he should not have those unsound beliefs to begin with. What good is the belief that Poinsettias are poisonous if you don't rush your child to the emergency room just to find out it's an urban legend. Would you have any support for somebody who believed that, but when their four year old ate Poinsettias told him to walk it off?

Sen. Vitter (R) oppressed for his family values.

If continuing to believe in and acknowledge those values causes some to attack me because of my past failings, well, so be it.

In a press conference after revelations that he frequented prostitutes, Vitter (R) made what is perhaps the stupid comment ever. That his continued support for family values inspires the attacks against his character. Sure, he was into diaper fetishism but really it's that combined with his strong upright moral values which makes for the bluntness of the attacks. So, if he did what he did but didn't say what he says, he wouldn't be attacked as a hypocrite right now. So really, isn't he being attacked for voicing his strong moral standpoints?



I'm going directly to the airport... and *NOT* stopping off at some whorehouses.

Liberal pastor preaches fundamentalism, in a round about way...

The question is a straight forward one. Why is it accepted to defend one's bigotry against gays by referencing one's religion, while it is no longer accepted as a way to defend slavery or opposition to women's suffrage?

Really, he's arguing against cherry picking. He's arguing that you should take all of the Bible or none of the Bible. That if you no longer defend one type of bigotry with the Bible you should no longer be permitted to defend any type of bigotry with it. Well, I have to admit, that's a pretty good point. Lets either bring back slavery or give everybody equal rights regardless who they love.

Prayers in Senate... an abomination!

Senate prayers (which shouldn't exist anyway) were disrupted because they were given by a Hindu rather than your typical Christian prayer. Oddly this caused a stir. As if Christians only want Christian prayers rather than morality and religion of all types in the public square. That would be rather hypocritical.

As a staunch defender of kowtowing to Christian will, I would like to volunteer my services of giving a Christian prayer in congress.

I telepathically beseech you, first-century, wish-granting Jewish zombie. May your death which satisfied your vendetta against us for something not of our doing also satisfy your bloodlust within this hallowed chamber. Amen.

Rudy Giuliani is America's Mayor! He is a hero to the New York's firefighters and a certified terrorist killer...

... and nobody should say otherwise until after the primary.

Don't sink the leaky boats, until they are put into the race.



After, he's the nominee, then he's a dress-wearing hero killer who used your loved ones to fill pot holes.