Sunday, March 8, 2009

Pastor deflected gunshot with Bible...

Shot dead...

I don't know how shooting a bible counts as having a bullet deflected. The myth busters have tried that and it doesn't work.

Police: Ill. pastor deflected gunshot with Bible

Wow. One bullet hit a bible. That's not deflected you dumbass.

MARYVILLE, Ill. – Illinois State Police say the pastor gunned down at a church in a St. Louis suburb used a Bible to deflect the first of four rounds fired during his Sunday sermon.

State Police Director Larry Trent says the Bible exploded, producing what appeared to be confetti.

Wow. The Bible has magical powers.

Trent says only one of the four rounds fired from the .45 caliber handgun struck and killed 45-year-old pastor Fred Winters.

"Struck and killed" apparently the first bullet gets magically stopped (probably just slowed down) the rest get to kill you.

Prediction: Within a week this story is going to passed around without the subsequent death.


Sparrowhawk said...

I think the more newsworthy part of this is that a pastor was apparently shot while giving his sermon. As for the bible stuff...ok so it exploded into paper, which is what it's made of, and it didn't safe his life...ok?

Tatarize said...

Why would that be newsworthy? If you want to shoot a pastor it's probably easiest when you know where he is? What's so odd about shooting them while they are busy telling people arcane nonsense like never work on the Sabbath. I mean, it's the Sabbath, that's their job!

Martin said...

God apparently tried really hard to save this man's life. He could deflect only a few bullets before running out of manna and so the pastor died. But it's a win for God because people will pass it around and tell of how the Bible can deflect bullets.

In 30 years Christians will wear clothes made of Bibles.