Bones Season 3 Finale.

Well there I was catching up on Bones having a nice several days worth of watching TV episodes. Hulu was useful in this respect have S1 of the show, and it's pretty good. Corny at times and the same general rote plot. I do enjoy the open atheism and any list of TV atheists includes Bones (one of the two eponymous atheist TV characters who come to mind). Some of the writing making her awkward in social situations are a bit heavy handed and suggests she is somewhere on the autism spectrum unable to understand some exceedingly basic social cues. In any event, the season finale was just so utterly shit that I have to write about what a steaming pile of nonsense it was.

Be forewarned of spoilers even though if you watch the show you saw this crap months ago. So one of the reoccuring cases is Gormogon serial killer who murders different people and assembles the pieces into a skeleton passing on the trade to an apprentice. Formed to rid the world of the influences of secret societies. Which ties into Dr. Jack Hodgins' character who is rather conspiracy theorist/lefty-pinko/out-there-guy. I honestly hate this aspect of his character because he's all evidence and reasoned most of the time then he's the go to guy to insert a bit of crazy and not-so-crazy into the episodes. The writers can't tell the difference between belief in extra-terrestrial visitors and belief that the Iraq War was sold to the American people under false pretenses.

Well one of his more absurd insertions is talk of secret societies as evil agents of mass importance. A cursory look at the evidence suggests they are little more than grown up frats with stupid stories. The Straight Dope has pretty good explanations of the Masons. The idea that Hodgins would accept whacked out conspiracy theories beyond what there is pretty reasonable evidence for is already bad enough. Then, in the plot of the Finale, it was reveled that the apprentice to the Gormagon was none other than than the lovable character Dr. Zack Addy who blew himself up to buy time for the Master Gormagon to steal the statue from the vault (where they stored the stuff they grabbed in a previous episode).

When asked why he would join a cannibalistic (I mentioned the guy ate their faces right?) serial killer anti-masonic murderer he claimed that the logic was impeccable. Because, secret societies exist. Secret societies are harmful to society (because Hidgins' talks about them). Killing members of secret societies eating their faces and making stupid statues of them out of the bones is therefore the moral course of action.

I'm sorry, but I am suppose to believe that first one scientists believes this and second another one takes his word for it when even cursory research would determine that secret societies are mostly stupid (save if there's some reciprocal business dealings I suppose) and that eating faces in a mass murder spree is a poor choice of action.

Some of the stuff in the show was previously stupid and oddly wrong. Booth (main character, partner of Bones) mentions that it takes hundreds of years to evolve and Bones corrects him and says "thousands and thousands" when modern research says that years and decades are enough for viruses and bacteria and human evolution has been progressing at a remarkable clip for several hundred years. Some of the ham-fisted attempts to make Bones seem socially naive have been almost mind-numbing, like not understanding why anybody would want children. Some things have been remarkably stupid... but they weren't plot. This is plot being pinned on the crappiest foundations of a really stupid character aspect of another character. Frankly it's utterly stupid and makes no sense.

I blame Fox. Fox airs Bones. Most shows don't go braindead retarded save for a few of those on Fox. There was a House episode where some junky told House that he had a near death experience and it was the shit, so House stuck a fork into a light socket because he simply must know. This bit of Bones plot was that dumb but that bit in House was just a bit and not plot... and not just plot but major plot.

Okay, off to change my TV.com avatar from Dr. Zach Addy to something else. I mean, it was okay when he was just the geeky semi-anti-social scientist ex-grad student of Bones... but when they made him a complete moron who murders people based on really really bad argument and really really bad evidence... I've gotta get something else. In part, I connected with the character and feel that this plot would be about as stupid as me entering the seminary and part-timing as a face-eating cannibal.

...

Okay, I changed my Avatar to Adama from BSG. If he's a cylon... I quit.

I Am Legend-arily bad.

{{Spoiler Warning}}

I hate to say it but there's so much potential there. You even see the original ending there, ready made for the movie. However, pow, God did it. Really, had the reasoning for the survivalist colony been "I heard on the radio from somewhere else" or "I have actual information from the mainland and you've been cut off from everything for years" sure. It was attributed to God. And I daresay 90% of the world population dropping dead, 9% going zombie, and 1% surviving to be eaten by the zombies is a good argument for the non-existence of an all-powerful benevolent god. Certainly, atheism is called for, but a mountain town... not really.

Also, if you have three years and know exactly what you're fighting. You might want to have a better defended base of operations.

The original ending to the film was that he was the monster. The people were still alive and kind of messed up, but he was the monster going about and killing them. He kidnapped a woman. The same man who tried to save her by running a bit out in the sun was the same who set the trap with the manikin, and who lead the attack on his house at the end. Really, he was trying to save the woman the doctor took. He was just going around murdering people willy-nilly... and it was really he who was the monster. Zing. That would have been the right ending, and a good one at that... but no... atheist doctor can't even believe in a mountain town. If you can't believe in God you can't believe in anything. Also, a number of his defenses were actually good enough. You're telling me a vault in the basement isn't enough? And what the hell good were those lights? He used them a lot for being completely ineffective.

It was 98% of a great movie. I hope they offer alternate endings on the DVD.